This is a follow-up to last week’s post on giving something up for Lent that a) doesn’t benefit us in the long run, and b) actually costs us something. Instead of giving something up, we should consider giving something over. You can read that post here.
At the end of the post, I said I was starting Lent by giving up 40 items of clothing.
And here they are. The one rule I had for myself is that they actually had to be clothes women would want to wear . I could have found 40 ratty t-shirts, tank tops, and undershirts, but if I gave them away, really it would only benefit me. I love these clothes. A lot of them I wore in a previous life, some I bought because they were on sale (see that fluorescent yellow skirt with the tag still on it? Lord Jesus I pray that a sister with beautiful mocha skin finds it and does it more justice than my pasty whiteness could ever dream of.) Some were a gift. All are in excellent condition and beautiful. May they find a good home to someone who will wear them and love them.
Let’s take an honest look at what this cost me (or cost the Pastor Husband).
Because it wasn’t just the money. We had to spend time to earn the money, so each item represents a dollar amount and a time amount. Maybe the dress costs two hours and $40.
And for this, I’m so sorry.
Let’s pretend that everything here costs an average of $25. That’s $1,000 total. Imagine I bring home $20 per hour. I had to spend 50 hours to have all this stuff. I have to ask myself, “was it worth it?” If I’m honest, I don’t like the answer. And maybe I’m not alone in this. I got really good at justifying my purchases and my credit card swiping skills are honestly superb. I’m willing to bet that few people can fit their whole name in the credit card signature box using that stylus thingy as quickly and as legibly as I can. Remember kids, practice makes perfect.
And for this too, I’m so sorry.
The librarians among us will catalog this under non fiction for sure. As Americans we’ve linked our material goods with our happiness. We believed the lie that the blessing is in the abundance. The truth is that buying begets buying, and the more you buy, the more you feel compelled to buy. And as for me, for a long time, I was an expert spender.
Hear my heart and not my words on this one.
Working is not wrong. Working is good. But if we begin to attach a time-currency to what we buy and not just a money-currency, we may see that items are so much more expensive than the number on the price tag, and thus, probably not worth the purchase. And when I began to make this connection, I realized that I worked way too hard to spend so, errrrrrrr, excellently.
And time is a precious currency in itself. Some of us will have money we can’t seem to spend fast enough, but all of us will one day run out of time. And we can usually see when we get to the end of the money, but more often than not, we can never anticipate when we will get to the end of our time.
But as a citizen of heaven, there is a corner in my heart that knows: this isn’t all there is. Don’t throw away this time and this money, because it’s not mine to begin with. Everything is on loan. And all could be gone tomorrow. Or this could be my last night’s sleep. And how did I spend my last day? Perpetuating the cycle of spending time to spend money to fill a house and a closet and a schedule with things that provide no true joy?
Good God, I’m so sorry.
Time is a gift and it’s fleeting. May we live as though we know in our hearts we are on borrowed time. May we spend as though we know in our hearts this truth- the money isn’t ours. It never was. It was paid to someone who paid it to someone and then God decided to entrust it to us. It’s a cycle. It’s God’s money and around and around it keeps going. From one person to the next. May they know how much we love our God by how we stand in the gap for His children. I don’t want to be really good at spending. I want to be really good at loving. When my time is up, I want to have love to show for my life, not stuff.
Are we supposed to feel guilty about having money?
Nope-nopity-nope-nope-NOPE. But we are supposed to live like we know Who it came from. And we are supposed to live like we know who we are and Whose we are and what we are here for and where we are going. And since we have the ability to respond to meet His children’s needs, it’s very much our responsibility to do so. May I practice mindfulness in such a way that it becomes a habit. And maybe God says to us, “Remember kids, practice makes perfect.”
Oh, friends, the time is so precious and so fleeting. From here forward, my joy will come from being with those I love and those I am called to love. I will find joy in doing what I am created to do, and I will do this one wild and beautiful thing. And I will be blessed in it. There is no blessing in the accumulation of things, anyway. And when my time has run out, I will look back and see that I’ve spent the time and the money to build His Kingdom and not my own.
Amen, amen, and amen.
I came into this world with nothing and will leave with nothing. What a relief that I don’t have to carry forever that which looks beautiful but burdens the soul and clutters the mind. Photo Credit: Eastlyn Bright